11 Memes That Are Too Real for Recent College Grads
If you graduated college recently, or are staring down the barrel of your upcoming graduation date, then you’ll absolutely know what we’re talking about. Welcome to adulthood. Spoiler: It sucks.
- We Know Who Really Got You Through College…
- Enjoy Your Crippling Post-College Debt
1 month before graduation: “Finals, finals, finals, ohdeargod, finals.”
1 day before graduation: “YASSS I OWN THIS WORLD. SLAAAAY.”
1 hour after graduation: “Cool, I’m 100% ready to take on my new financial burden, find a job, and get my life together!”
You sweet, naive fools.
- College Life Was a Sleep-Deprived Picnic
Oh, your late teens and early twenties spent amongst friends, drinking and frolicking all night with little to no consequences or responsibilities was sooo hard? Hahaha CUTE.
- You Are Successfully Educated IN NOTHING
You make it to graduation day, you look around, and you get a sinking feeling in your stomach. You waited. And the truth was confirmed. NOBODY HAS ANY CLUE WHAT THEY’RE DOING. ALL ADULTS ARE JUST GUESSING.
- Your Response to Every Baby Boomer’s Questions About Post-Grad Plans
What does your freshly-printed diploma get you? A mountain of student debt, and diddly-squat. Maybe a sense of satisfaction*?
- Kiss Your Youthful Freedoms Goodbye
Everyone seems to have neglected to mention that you wait your whole life to be a real grown-up and do whatever you want. Now you just want to go to bed early so you can wake up in time for your new obligations instead of your only class at 2 p.m.
- The Most Accurate Representation of Your First Few Steps Into Post-College Life
Just give up. Crawl back to grad school. It’s safe there.
- You Hand Them Your Bank Account, They Hand You a Piece of Paper
If you’re lucky, maybe they’ll give you a nice pen or something at your graduation. But every dime you receive for graduation from your relatives goes straight into the bottomless pit where your student loan monster lives. Feed that money monster… the alumni association will still call you during dinner. Because you’re already a zillionaire straight out of college, right? You’re making so much money right now, RIGHT?!
- Your Diet Is No Longer Socially Acceptable
You can’t go to the store, purchase boxes of Cup-a-Noodles in bulk, and have everyone in the immediate vicinity chuckle, shake their heads, and wryly say, “College student, huh?” anymore. Now, in addition to having to learn how to be a functioning member of society, you have to learn how to cook more than just spaghetti?! This is BULL.
- You’re Starting to Regret Following Your Heart
They always said that you could be whatever you wanted. They said you should major in something that you’re passionate about. But they never said that you would just wind up working at Starbucks no matter how much you know about the techniques of neo-classical painters in Norway.
- Even If You Manage to Get A Great Job…
You’re pretty much guaranteed to be in over your head by 20 freaking leagues. But don’t worry. You’re really good at flip cup. So you got this data analysis report thing.